工具帖——有国外小说可以发到这里来，我翻译。

天地玄黄

帮顶一下，最近没金币关照您的生意了

天地玄黄

CAUTION: THIS DOES HAVE SCENES OF MALE SCAT/FARTS


"Hello everyone. My name is Isabella The Body Snatcher O'Reilly, and I'm here to tell you about my morning routine. Well, my alarm clock wakes up around 5 AM, and that's when I get up and do some morning stretches for around 5-10 minutes. Then, after, I go down the stairs and crack two or three eggs and I drink them down raw. After that, I proceed to jog around the block for an hour straight nonstop before coming back home, to which I take off all of my clothes and lather my body in soap and use a wet towel for a couple minutes before drying myself off and placing on my usual uniform for the day. Once I'm finished with cleansing myself, that's when I proceed to take a morning dump. Because of my IBS, I tend to take some wet and sloppy dumps and they're certainly loud. Sometimes, you can even hear them even while the door's closed. That's when my husband comes in and comforts me while I'm crapping on the toilet. He thinks my ass sounds hot, my whole body's hot, sometimes, he gets an erection because of that. If I have the time, me and Joseph have a good love-making session, and after that, I wake my kids up for school. From then on out, whatever I do is basically up to me, and that, my friends, is Isabella O'Reilly's morning routine."


Typical Isabella Morning Dump: "PBBBBBBBBTSTSTSSTSTSSSTSSTST" "Urgh...", Isabella grunted as had a loud and nasty sounding shart that blasted out of her ass and painted the toilet bowl with spots of brown. "FRRRRRRTSTSSSSTT-SPLRRRRTRTRRRRTTRRTRT" "Ohhh, there we go.", Isabelle groaned as another noisy wet shart blasted out and some sloppy brown poop was coming out of her mif ass into the toilet. "Oh, good morning, Izzy. How you doing right now?", Joseph said upon hearing Isabella blowing up the toilet with her loud and nasty sounding shits.


"PLOP-PLOP-SPLOOOORTRTTRRRRTT" "Just run about 2 mile straight, Joseph. And now, I'm giving this toilet a really good workout.", Isabella replied as she was pushing mushy brown diarrhea out of her hot filthy rear end into the toilet. "Ah, that sounds wonderful baby. I'm impressed that you have so much energy in that body of yours. It's almost boundless.", Joseph retorted. "I know, Joe, I know. "SPLAAAAAAAAAAARRTRTTTRRRRTRRT" "Well, I go above and beyond for this boxing career. Hell, I just love working out period. I have that warrior blood within me.", Isabella said back as a load of thick brown mush had squirted out of her dirty supple milf butt into the toilet. "Yep, you're definitely my Amazonian warrior wife. And it's my duty to make sure that you're feeling well whenever you have bowel problems.", Joseph said as he knelt to Isabella's level and started rubbing her thighs. Soon enough, Joseph started rubbing Isabella's ass cheeks. "Heh, you're already looking to get some ass this early in the morning aren't you? "SPLLLLLLLATTTRTRRRTRTRT-SPLASH-SPLASH-PLOP" "Well, you're in luck, because it's the weekend, and the kids don't need to go to school today.", Isabella replied, having a seductive tone in her voice while she still shitting on the toilet. "Oh, hell yes! Meet me in the bedroom when you're done! And keep the door open. I wanna continue hearing the arousing noises your ass makes.", Joseph said as he left the bathroom while harboring a clear erection.


"What's up, guys? This is Catherine O'Reilly, and I'm here to tell you about my morning routines for some reason. I mean, I'm probably not that special, we all get up in the morning, but whatever... Let's continue. Usually, either my Dad or my Mom yells at me to force me to get up. Urgh... School starts way too fucking early, I can't learn shit when classes start at 7 in the morning. Anyway, I get up, and I dress myself for school, wish they just let you wear what the hell you wanna wear. After that, I eat some weed edibles so I can get nice and real high so that I can tolerate school ha ha ha! Don't tell my Mom I get high every day though. Once I get high, I have to take a shit. I guess IBS runs in my family, so I usually take some monstrous shits on a daily basis. I guess I should change my diet so I won't be shitting so much, but fuck that, I'm not eating a bunch of salads and vegetables, it just can't beat a nice and juicy burger.  Sometimes, I take such a long time shitting, that it takes up all of my free time and I have to go to school right I'm done wiping my ass. But if I have some free time, I'll rock out to some epic death metal or whatever shock rock hardcore shit until it's time for me to go to school. And uh... That's it, that's my morning routine. Now, get outta here, I gotta dump major fucking ass right now."


Typical Catherine Morning Dump: "FRRRRRRRRRRRT-SPLLLLRTRTTRTRTRT-SPLASH-PLOP" "Urgh... God, that stung my ass a bit.", Catherine replied as she was currently emptying her bowels on the toilet. There was loose and runny hot brown stool that was secreting out of Catherine's ass into the toilet. "BRAAAAAAAAAPTPTPTTPPTPTT-SPLOOOOTRTRTRTT-PLOP-PLOP-SPLASH" "I know I gotta lay off the spicy foods, but they taste too damn good to pass up.", Catherine said to herself. "Argh... You know what? Let's see what Bethany is up to right now.", Catherine said as she pulled out her phone from her pocket and called her good friend, Bethany. "PBBBBBBBBTBBTTBTTTBT-SCKLRAAAAAAAAAKLKLLKLKKKL-SPLASH-SPLASH-PLOP" "Yo, Beth, good morning, girl. How's it going with you?", Catherine asked her friend. "Argh... Yo, Cathy, I'm doing alright, I guess. I'm not feeling too good right now, though.", Bethany replied.


"VRRRRTRTRRTRRRRTTRTTRTT-SPLOOOOOORTRTRTRTRTR-SPLASH-PLOP" "Oh, yeah, and why is that exactly?", Catherine asked in curiosity. "It's because I have a bad case of the shits right now. Orgh... It's almost like I'm pissing outta my ass right now.", Bethany answered back.  "FRRRTRRRRRTRTRTRTRRRT-SPLLLLLLRTRTRTRTRTRTRTRTRRT-PLOP-SPLASH" "Girl, that's an everyday thing with me, but yitou already know. Hey. Bethany, you still get those tickets to the show?", Catherine asked. "Urgh... Yeah, I still got those tickets. What, you thought I was gonna lose those?", Bethany replied. "PBBBBSTTSTSTT-SPLLTRTRTRTRTR-PLOP-SPLASH" "Beth, you're known for losing shit like all of the time. Anyway, I gotta go, it's still on for fucking Saturday, whoo!! Hope your ass feels better soon.", Catherine said as Bethany said her goodbye and Catherine hung up the phone.


"Hello there. My name is Maximillian O'Reilly, you can just call me Max though. And I'm here to talk about my morning routines. So, yeah, my alarm clock wakes me up for when I have to go to school. I go to the bathroom, brush my teeth, and then dress myself for school. After that, depending on whatever the school's breakfast is gonna suck or not, I go to the kitchen and eat something there. After that, I watch TV a little bit before I have the urge to take a dump. Yeah... I have bowel problems, so more often than not, I'm on the toilet for a long time taking a nasty crap. It's so embarrassing when I have to take a dump in a public bathroom, but that's besides the point. Whenever I'm pooping, I tend to start texting my girlfriend just to pass the time. Sometimes, she's pooping as well. Sapphire looks so cute on the can, heh... But again, that's besides the point. Anyway, when I'm done pooping, I clean myself up and I watch more TV or watch Youtube until it's time for Cathy and me to go to school. And yep, that's the end of my Morning Routine. I like it whenever I'm included in stuff, usually, it's just the ladies in my family. Anyway, see ya later!"


Typical Max Morning Dump: "PBBBBTTBTBT-SPLAAAAAAPLLLPLPRRRT-SPLASH-PLOP" "Nnnngh... That was so forceful. Who knew that what I ate last night would trigger my bowels so much?" There was also a small, but hefty load of thick mushy brown diarrhea that squirted out of Max's ass into the toilet that ended with a good splash. "Ah, man, that means I'm probably gonna be shitting at school in the future... "FRRTRRRTRRRRRT-CRAAAAAAAAAAKLLKKLLKKLLKLLLK-SPLLLRTRRTRRTRTRTTRTTTRTRT-PLOP-SPLASH" "I really hope no one roasts me for taking a noisy dump in public", Max thought as soft and runny brown excrement came out of his messy bottom into the toilet. Because Max was feeling bad about the thought of crapping on a public toilet, Max decided to cheer himself up by texting his girlfriend Sapphire. "PHUUUUUURTRTRTTRRRTRRT-SPLRAAAAAAKLKKLKLKLLK-FRRTSTSTSTRRRRTTTRT-PLOP-SPLASH" "Hey, Sapphire, How you doing? I'm on the toilet right now", Max texted to Sapphire "What a coincidence. I've taking a dump right now, too.", Sapphire texted back. "BRAAAAATPTTTTPT-SPLASH-SPLASH-PLOP-SPLLLLTTRTTTRTRRTRRRRT-SPLASH" "Heh, that's pretty hot. Did your Mom's cooking upset your stomach again?", Max asked. "It certainly did. The inside of the toilet is a sloppy brown mess right now.", Sapphire said. "So sexy... Send a picture of you on the toilet and the aftermath inside the toilet bowl.", Max requested as he was getting turned on. "I'm on it.", Sapphire said as Max spent the rest of his time shitting on the toilet texting and flirting with his girlfriend.


"Hello there, folks. My name is Wanda O'Reilly, and I'm here to talk about my morning routine.  Well, obviously, it starts with me waking up. However, the first thing I do is check my panties and see if I haven't soiled myself while sleeping. Y-yeah... I've done that WAY too many times than I'd like to admit to. Assuming I haven't pooped my panties, I get outta bed and dress myself in a different uniform for the day. Not too long after that however, the urge to empty my bowels soon come forth. I have such a sensitive stomach and loose bowels, a large majority of whatever I eat goes right through me and I'm practically attached to the toilet, crapping my guts out. However, that doesn't stop my morning routine. I've got it to where I can brush my teeth and my hair and even do my makeup while I'm pooping on the toilet. After I'm doing emptying my bowels, I clean myself up and I take my large assortment of anti-diarrhea medication, and then I proceed to help Joseph with cleaning the house after everyone else has left, and that's my morning routine. Thanks for talking the time to listen to me, and I'll see you later."


Typical Wanda Morning Dump: "Oh my Lord! I almost soiled myself back there! "KRAAAAALKLKLKKLKL-SPLOOOOOOOORTRTRRRTRTRTRRRT-SPLASH-SPLASH-PLOP" "Thank goodness I'm still quick on my feet.", Wanda said as she had some really runny greenish diarrhea squirt out of her Gmilf ass into the toilet. "In fact, I've gone through 3 whole months without having to toss away a soiled pair of panties. "PHUUUUURRTTRTRRT-SPLASH-PLOP-PLOP-SPLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAALLPLLLRTRTLLTRRTRSSTSTSSSSTSTST" "Impressive if I may say so myself.", Wanda said as she continued her watery/runny dump on the toilet. "I don't know how my daughter does it to this day. "SPLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARTRTRTRRRRTRRTRRRTRT" "My Izzy is a championship boxer, a busy mother, has a high protein diet, and she only soils herself like 4 times a year at best.", Wanda thought to herself. "PBBBBBSTSBTSTBSBTSBSTST-SPLASH-SPLASH-PLOP-SPLRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKLKKLKKLKKLKLKKLK" "In any case, my daughter and maybe even her children are gonna be remembered in the history books for decades to come. I feel so proud of her.", Wanda said, smiling widely. Upon that, Wanda began to groom herself while still shitting violently on the toilet.


END OF THE STORY

天地玄黄

One day in the air over a big dessert. The big yellow Helicarrier,which became flew by Natascha Romanov alias Black Widow was ready to land, because her new mission was to find the new secret Headquarter of Hydra and she had a lot of traces, where she could find the Headquarter. She also had to find out,how the newest Weapon of Hydra worked.This time she had Wonder Woman at her side and she was thankful for it. "Thank you, for your Help Wonder Woman! It's very nice from you to help me!",she told her. Wonder Woman answered Black Widow,that it was absolute no problem! It was for sure, to get help from her, when a radical Organization like Hydra made a new devilish plan. It was also sure,that they had to destroy it. Black Widow was the same opinion, but knew,that it would become not that easy especially to come into the Headquarter,which was far away not anymore. Wonder Woman had the idea, kick some Hydra Asses, so it would become no problem to come in, but Black Widow contradict her. She knew, that the Headquarter had spy cameras everywhere,which would them very soon. They need a plan to come inside, so that they wouldn't become recognized. She thought a little bit and very soon she had a plan and she told it to Wonder Woman. In her opinion Black Widow's plan to masquerade themselves as dealer for Machine pieces, if a piece of the Machine become destroy was perfect. So it would be absolute no problem to come in. It became a long search, because the secret Headquarter was very difficult to find, because it was old Fabric,which looks like a giant wooden hat and there was a high fence around it. Beside the fence,there was a wooden guardian house and one of the Hydra Guardian sat in it. Now Black Widow landed the Helicarrier. " Wonder Woman, we have to change the vehicle now! We take the faked business car, which I had rent myself from Shield for the Mission. Nick Fury and Maria Hill allowed it to me! Please, hide yourself, because when the guard from Hydra see you, he find out,that you are a Goddess and that would be very bad for the Mission! I hope you misunderstood my words in no way, cause I have nothing against you!",she said. " That's absolute understandable! You know,what you have to do!", answered Wonder Woman strict. Then she jumped into the car and hide herself behind the driver seat.  Together they drive to the entry door and they heard the guardian saying: What do you want here? Without a pass you have no right to drive through this door!" Now Black Widow answered with a deep voice : I have no pass, but I'm a dealer for Machine pieces and I want to talk with your Boss!"
"That would become happen in no way! He is too busy! That's my last word!", told the guardian cold. "Well, no problem, but what would happen,when one of the Machines doesn't work and when your Boss find out, that you prevent to repair this Machine,because you don't let me in?", said Black Widow and she knew,that she reached her goal. She wanted to make the guardian nervous,so that he had no choice to let her in and it worked. They were inside very quick and Wonder Woman also left the faked car. " That was perfect Black Widow",she gratulate her. "Not so loud Wonder Woman! We have to hide ourselves and it's better, when they don't find us!" They looked around and find big piles of boxes and hide themselves behind it. "Now we wait,till a Hydra member is coming,who want to the Boss and we follow him! Is that okay?",she asked Wonder Woman. She told Black Widow,that it was absolute okay so because she want to talk with her about Max a little bit. Black Widow asked Wonder Woman if he was okay! "Well, Black Widow! I think he is not okay, because a lot of Super Villains want to punish him all the time and he miss you!", she told Natascha. " That a lot of Villains want to punish him, is not my problem! He have to accept,that I'm a pro agent killer and that I don't have a lot of time!", she answered her. "Yes,but he is your own Fart Slave and even if you doesn't want to accept it, it chances nothing! You have to protect him, but you always think about your job! That is absolute wrong from you and you should stop to be so dirty to him! I mean look at Justin how happy he is with his Fart goddesses Supergirl, Rey and Harley Quinn!" It's better,when you spent your time more with Max,even if you are not happy with his Work! He gives his best and all that counts!",she ended. "Yea, maybe I should do that, but when..." Suddenly she stopped talking,because her stomach began to gurgle very loud. "Are you okay, Black Widow?, asked Wonder Woman. "Yea...I'm...okay, I  only... become  a little farty...from...the Sandwich...which...I had...at noon!",she answered with clenched teeth. "That's okay! Let it out! As a Half Goddess I don't care about it! Let me tell you,the Sandwich gave also me horrible ass Gas! That's perfect! So we can let it out together!", answered Wonder Woman! "Please don't do that now! Our mission would be over, before it start and I also have Maria Hill at the Funk! She can hear every word of us!" told Black Widow her. Suddenly she felt a press in her gut and she knew shocked,that a Fart was coming. So she cover up her butt with her Hands to weak the sound of her Fart, but even if she covered up her butt, the noise was loud enough to hear! Quickly she turn off the Funk and thought "Damn Farts! They destroy the whole Mission!" Wonder Woman said to her,that it was a very well fart,but she was sorry, because she couldn't hold back her Farts not anymore. So she pushed very hard and let her Fart fly! It was horrible loud like an explosion and it shake the whole Fabric. Black Widow was absolute shocked by this Fart explosion,because she know,that all men of Hydra would find her so. She was right,because Wonder Woman's Fart activate the alarm system. They heard the voice : "There is an intruder in the Fabric! Find them and throw them into the prison. The plan, of our Boss,which he called "Mission Death stink" to stink up all Superhero Headquarters to make them to a giant Hydra  Death Labour is in danger and it is not acceptable when it become destroy! I warn the Boss and you search them and bring them to me and I bring them to the Boss! He should see their death! Is that understand?" The men nod. "Okay, now you can kick some Hydra Asses, Wonder Woman! I follow the Head of Hydra!", said Black Widow! " Very well, I will fight you the way free and you destroy this Stink Machine!" yelled Wonder Woman, because Black Widow was already at the chase of the Hydra Head. While she chase him she heard Wonder Woman's shattering Fart explosion and was in fear,that her Farts would destroy the whole Fabric,but she also had problems with her own Farts,that she let out while running,because they stink up the whole corridor,where she was running and she could only gag because of the awful stinking smell. She wished herself Max would be here at her side to stop her Farts right at the moment, cause they ruin her job for Shield and she had enough of that. Very soon they were at the main room of the Boss. Quickly she hide herself again. She hoped,that Hydra's Boss would leave the main room,where she was sure,that he would have the weapon. She had luck,that the Boss heard Wonder Woman's racket and was very angry about it, because he couldn't work at the weapon. So he left the room and went to the entrance Hall,cause he want attend,that it was noisy enough. As he went away, Black Widow entered the room and saw,that two men guard the Machine, but she had no problem to knock them unconscious and then she fart again so long,that the two men stay unconscious. Then she stole a piece of the Machine. She knew,which piece she want to make,that the Machine doesn't work not anymore. She had enough time to escape,because in the Entrance Hall the absolute chaos going on and it stinks inhuman. Black Widow couldn't stop to gag and she felt dizzy. It was very difficult not to vomit herself. So she cover up her nose and her mouth with both hands. In her opinion Wonder Woman did a perfect job,but she never thought,that her Farts could stink up the whole Fabric. " Come on Black Widow,quick! We have to leave the building, before it break down! She grab Black Widow and together they run out of the stinking building in the last second, before it break down by Wonder Woman's Fart explosion. They jump in the car and drove away to the Helicarrier and fly high in the sky. While flying Black Woman told Maria Hill by Funk all of Hydra's weapon, but the problem was already over,cause she became destroyed by an little break down! Then she ended the Funk. Then she told Wonder Woman,that she learned her lesson! Next time Max would come with her, but she also should learn her lesson to hold her Farts back as long as possible. Wonder Woman promised it and together they fly away, back to the Club of the gassy Superheroes.
这两篇翻译一下吧，还是80金

un9

da lao dui bu qi , shu ru fa chu le wen ti , xia zhou zai fa hao bu ?

天地玄黄

un9 发表于 2021-8-25 12:25
da lao dui bu qi , shu ru fa chu le wen ti , xia zhou zai fa hao bu ?

没问题的，不着急

天地玄黄

帮顶一下，希望大佬早日修好键盘

un9

明天就要开学了。到寒假怕是没法翻译了。 在这期间我可能还会上论坛，但无法发文。
就这样静静地看着大佬们的文章吧。
寒假再见。

un9

天地玄黄 发表于 2021-8-31 00:04
帮顶一下，希望大佬早日修好键盘

明天就要开学了。到寒假怕是没法翻译了。 在这期间我可能还会上论坛，但无法发文。
要不您先找别人翻译吧。别耽误您的时间了。

A500

un9 发表于 2021-8-31 07:43
明天就要开学了。到寒假怕是没法翻译了。 在这期间我可能还会上论坛，但无法发文。
就这样静静地看着大佬 ...

大佬学业加油啊

天地玄黄

un9 发表于 2021-8-31 07:45
明天就要开学了。到寒假怕是没法翻译了。 在这期间我可能还会上论坛，但无法发文。
要不您先找别人翻译 ...

不着急，没事的